Doing To Much
Thank you for reading,
I have had some allergy issues this week, so I haven’t felt well. When I don’t feel well I become obsessed with not getting worse or sick, or sometimes I think I’m a hypochondriac. I start to ruminate about getting sick too. I start noticing people more, especially at work. If you don’t know, I do maintenance at an elementary school. One person came into work last week for two days and on the third day she left after only an hour. Everyone knew she was sick the first day. Why not stay home, feel better and not get everyone sick? Why do people do this? I know some people don’t have a lot of time or cannot afford to take off, however that 's not a lot of people. If that isn’t enough, then there are all the children who don’t wash their hands and the parents who send their sick child to school. I had to get my thoughts under control, which is hard to do at times. I started taking a garlic bulb a day not to get a sinus infection, plus extra Vitamin C. What made this week worse for me was that I was extremely busy every day except for Thursday, and that was just a normal day. On normal days I get around 18k in steps. I start feeling tired around 25k. On Wednesday I had 31k in steps. When I’m not feeling well my OCD wants to take over again. I need to stop, take a minute to assess the situation before doing a compulsion. Yes, I would believe doing garlic bulb and taking Vitamin C is a compulsion. Compulsions can grow very quickly into being something that runs my life. I don’t want to ever have that again. Rachel told me in my session this week to remember to use my senses, so I put a note on my phone to use my senses on the lock screen. We also went over the would I rather question, mom’s passing, a little about dating, being more social, and to stop trying to do too much.
She wants me to find out what is most important in my life, what I want to do with my life, and to list these things out. We are talking about stuff other than family, etc. I’m overdoing myself by trying to write every day, doing writing contest, I’m taking a writing class for six weeks, do Tai Chi, learn Italian, find a place to go on vacation this summer, deal with fixing the house I’m in along with the place up north, try to have a social life, and try to date, to which I do neither of the last two at all. I haven’t been on a date for over six years. My social life is work. I cannot fit everything in. She also wants me to relax. She is right. I need to take care of myself. Self care is important. I’m going to spend some time this weekend finding out what is important in my life, and slow down on the other stuff.
One last thing, I’m kinda glad that this week was busy for me on February 3, 2026 was the anniversary of my mom’s passing. I believe God and mom had me stay busy, so I didn’t have time to reflect on missing her. Mom told me to enjoy life and remember the good times. That is what I want to do with the rest of my time here on this earth.
“Ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind … or forgotten.” —Stitch, Lilo & Stitch
Here are some websites to find help with your OCD.
In Arizona
https://ocdandptsdtherapy.com/
https://ocdaz.org/
United States & Global
Please remember that I am not a therapist, but a person who has OCD, cares about others, and wants to help any way I can. I am not giving advice. I am just telling my own experiences, and praying my experiences help someone. If you need help please go get the help you need.
Until next time,
Tracy T. Agnelli
